Why do Britons think young people have unhealthy attitudes to sex?

Labour MP Samantha Niblett made waves last month with her 'Yes Sex Please, We're British!' and pledges to bring sex toys into Parliament. The campaign calls for lifelong sex education to “to help people understand consent, prevent abuse and violence”.

Doubtless one of the groups Niblett most hopes to reach is young men, with the attitudes of young men towards women and sex having been a prominent point of concern in the media in recent years.

Indeed, YouGov Daily Agenda polling has found that 24% of Britons think that most young men have “unhealthy or inappropriate attitudes towards sex”. However, among young women (those aged 18-24) this figure shoots up to 57%. For their part, 18-24 year old men are also notably more likely than their elders to say the same, with 33% believing most young men have such issues regarding sex, compared to 21% of all men.

Few of any age or gender believe the number of young men with unhealthy or inappropriate attitudes towards sex amounts to “none or a small minority of them” – just 7% of all Britons give this answer, with men over 50 the most likely to, at 11%.

While far fewer Britons believe that most young women have unhealthy or inappropriate attitudes towards sex (9%), relatively few would also characterise the situation as ‘no or only a small minority’ having such attitudes (20%).

Instead, the bulk of the public tend to think half (20%) or ‘a large minority’ (21%) of young women have unhealthy sex attitudes – and indeed, it is again young women themselves who are most likely to think so, with 66% giving one of these two answers.

What do Britons think is wrong with young people's attitudes to sex?

But what do Britons think these unhealthy and inappropriate attitudes towards sex are? To dig deeper into public perceptions in this area, we used our new YouGov AI Interviewer tool to ask respondents: “where there are problems with young people's attitudes towards sex, what do you typically consider them to be?”

The AI agent then conducted interviews with each respondent, following up on their responses, in order to provide ‘the why’ behind what Britons think.

Social media and sexual norms

A major theme that emerged is the role that social media plays in sexual norms for young people. Answers in this category encompassed social media, online platforms and always-online culture as dominant sources of sexual information and norms that sexualise content early, amplify extreme narratives, and shape how relationships, dating and interaction should look and progress.

Unfortunately there are social media influencers that are set as role models for young men and women that encourage superficiality when it comes to sex. It doesn't help that pornography is easily accessible and joked and talked about in TV shows. It means as younger people get older they might not look at sex as a form of love and intimacy but as thrill seeking or it might become more of an addiction. (Female, 18-24)
As some social media sites use an algorithm to provide the user more of what they tend to look at, young people could get to see a lot of these aggressive and extreme videos, making them think that it is normal behaviour as they end up being led to more of the images and videos. (Female, 55+)
If you're a young male who has had a bad (or no) experience with girls, and you start looking for content to help you understand your feelings, you may very soon be confronted by people like Andrew Tate. Such people demean women and make them out to be mere objects. This dehumanising treatment morphoses into violent sexual practices, which may seem "normal" to a boy who has no other point of reference. (Male, 45-54)
Teenagers are naturally curious about sex and their own sexuality and place in the world. The Internet is a normal place to seek information but the loudest voices get the most attention, so these influences who are experts at attracting an audience rise to the top in terms of visibility and become a teenager's primary source of sex education. (Female, 35-44)

Quotes on "Social media setting sexual norms"

Misogyny and gender power dynamics

Another major theme was misogyny and gender power dynamics. Answers from respondents who touched on this topic focused on sexist and misogynistic beliefs, male entitlement to sex, and unequal gender power relations, including how objectification, toxic masculinity and polarised gender ideologies are learned, normalised and reinforced online and offline.

Narrow understandings about what a sexual relationship between consenting adults can and should be; young men's beliefs about what is appropriate behaviour, what they expect to be able to do and what they expect of young women; young women's lack of self-esteem and self-confidence, and their belief they have to go along with what's expected of them (to have the boy's approval) instead of setting appropriate boundaries for themselves. (Female, 55+)
Young people are bombarded with unhealthy & unrealistic expectations about sex. Young women think harmful acts like anal, breath play, bdsm are normal. They do not feel they can set boundaries or say No. Young men also see these messages and don't have social boundaries to contain a natural sexuality. Testosterone makes sex more important to males. They need better information to Hepburn learn to control destructive impulses. To learn to be loving gentle and romantic. Some young men are indulging the worst sex acts because these are normalised. It is harmful to individuals, society and the country. (Female, 55+)
As a culture we’re regressing from men and women being equal, boys are committing more violent crimes against women as they expect them to do as they want, young boys are raping girls believing it is there right to be able to (Female, 35-44)

Quotes on "Misogyny and gender power dynamics"

Pornography shaping expectations

Many also talked about the way that pornography is shaping expectations. Concerns raised in this regard revolve around online pornography as a primary reference point for understanding sex, shaping sexual scripts, behaviours and expectations in ways that normalise extreme, performance-focused or misogynistic practices and blur distinctions between fantasy and typical sex.

There is a lot of content that isn't usual and sex has become something performative. When you adults and children have rest access to this content they use this as a basis for what is normal. It removes sex from being part of a healthy relationship and promotes misogyny and human bodies become stage props (Male, 45-54)
Young men may feel inadequate due to not being able to perform like a porn star, with complicated positions that mainly exist for the sake of the camera. Young women may feel they have to perform degrading acts as they have seen in porn. By not talking about this it continues this perception (Male, 25-34)
its not realistic, it normalises aggression, it distorts their understanding of consent, relationships and what is healthy sexual behaviour. (Female, 35-44)

Quotes on "How porn is setting expectations"

Other responses

Other themes that respondents touched on included the failure of parents to instil the right values in their children, the impact of peer pressure, and concerns over perceptions of sex that are devoid of emotional context…

Ultimately it's the parents responsibility for bringing up their children however more and more parents seem to expect that to be done by the state/ Government. (Female, 55+)
Usually at puberty and during teen years, peer pressure from friends at high school, starts to build, to the point where young people might feel pressured into engaging in sex to be popular or to feel accepted (Female, 45-54)
A sizeable minority believing that it's devoid of emotions and that a high number/ "body count" is important and a way of measuring your social status. (Male, 25-34)

Quotes on "Other topics"

…and others rejected the premise, suggesting that there isn’t really an issue with young people’s attitudes to sex

I think we generally worry too much about it and get into moral panic territory too easily. The real issue isn't fundamentally sex but the fact that young people are generally at an instable point in their own lives, and the world around them is particularly trepidiatious currently (Male, 35-44)
I think sometimes people hear things about the Internet use of young people and get it out of proportion. Some young people may have unhealthy views about sex but my belief is that most don't. (Female, 55+)
I don’t think there’s any problem. I just think it’s just the same as it has always been. (Male, 35-44)

Quotes on: "Young people don't actually have issues with sex"

Attitudinal differences between groups

Younger women are especially likely to cite misogyny and power dynamics when compared to both men and older women, as well as how porn is shaping expectations.

We are all human at the end of the day. Women shouldn't be disregarded because of their previously established gender roles. Without women, men would not be able to do what they do, and they don't seem to see or understand that due to pure ignorance and it cannot stay that way. Older men are the issue, and they pass on their habits of crude insults and ignorance towards the newer generation. (Female, 18-24)
Sex work is sometimes described as empowering as it can involve the worker having power over the consumer. They think that a woman being in charge and "taking money from men" is her win, but I see this as control over her. She is the product, and it is just modern slavery. Even if she is her own boss, I truly find it hard to see this as something to be proud of. Its a terrible industry with nasty customers. I wont shame a sex worker, but I can disagree that their line of work is good. (Female, 18-24)
I think a lot of young men have bad attitudes towards sex where they think they’re entitled to it and look down on women who don’t want to have sex (with them). I think because of this young women have problems with attitudes towards sex because they feel that if they are not having sex or don’t want to something is wrong with them (Female, 18-24)
If I young person watches sexual content online they may think that reality will be the same and expect it to be like that leading to disappointment, wanting a partner to do things they don’t want to do etc. it can also create an addiction to sex / feeling that it’s essential when in reality it’s only a small part of a relationship. (Female, 25-34)

Quotes from young women on: "Misogyny and gender power dynamics"

For their part, young men are more likely to touch on the topic of emotional meaning and wellbeing

I suppose we're all afraid of appearing weak and unwanted. To me low body count is a thing I worry about because it's another way of seperating the wanted and desired to the unwanted and rejected (Male, 18-24)
Sex is inherently emotional, and young people treating it as something to do with someone without the prospect of a relationship does not lead to healthy or positive emotional experiences (Male, 25-34)
Content that involves distorted portrayals of relationships, for example content related to the Manosphere/Femosphere, clips from Love Island etc … Instead of portraying healthy relationships they either show sensationalized versions, or try to validate unhealthy feelings young people have and exploit them for financial gain. (Male, 25-34)

Quotes from young men on "Emotional meaning and wellbeing"

For both young men and young women, the role that social media plays was a top concern

I think more people have started to view sex the wrong way, likely by exposure to different attitudes on social media. I personally see it first as a biological function for reproduction and that is the first reason it should be considered, with the second reason being to show love in a comitted relationship. More young people now see it as goal number one for anyone of slight romantic interest and everything in the world has to revolve around it. (Male, 18-24)
Social media has caused actual human connections harder. Its harder to actually make real relationships … Everything is fake on social media. Real life is more disappointing (Male, 25-34)
Some men expect women to do as they say and not have a mind of their own. This isn’t helped by growth in popularity of trad wives on social media… It shows an idealised version of their life where they essentially do nothing. Most people are tired of being a slave to capitalism so see it as a sort of rebellion, when actually it feeds into capitalism (Female, 18-24)
I mean the rise in incels and crazily misogynistic men who think they are owed women’s bodies and subjugation. Male influencers encourage these ideas and tell young boys they should behave this way (Female, 18-24)

Quotes from young people on "Social media setting sexual norms"

For their part, older people are more likely than younger cohorts to bring up the issue of parenting and morality, as well as peer pressure

And as access to so much information and misinformation online is more available it’s difficult to parent children and keep them safe. I suppose you could say some parents are less involved and you might also say that some parents are working so hard unfortunately they don’t have time for such things. (Female, 55+)
Of course, parents totally hold the key. In the worst cases they hand on problems to the schools then defend bad behaviour leaving the teachers unable to address problems before they really takes embed. Schools should have a behavioural 'contract' that parents and older Kids sign up to. There is a general attitude in the UK when it comes to health, theft, rape, diet, behaviour etc. that someone else needs to fix the problem. This attitude needs to be addressed at the psychological level (Female, 55+)
It feels like there is an overall gradual break down in society when it comes to relationships between men and women for various reasons. The imagery portrayed in porn is damaging, people develop behavious based on things they learn from thier parents and the various things they come into contact with. (Male, 55+)
Social media can be immensely unhelpful. Access to this is monitored carefully for our grandchildren and great grandson but peer pressure cannot be controlled and despite hypocritical assurances, I believe commercial success overrides care for the young. (Male, 55+)
It probably occurs through peer pressure. For example, the elicit sharing of negative content. The thrill of the forbidden. Access can lead to them forming negative opinions about females in general. There does not seem to be positives in social media. Young people may join in to negative conversations when they really dont know the implications. Young women may want to get involved in what friends do. (Female, 55+)